or he may have had a long, happy relationship with one person. The thing is, no matter what some STEMBros believe, relationships aren’t math problems and statistics.
Dating and relationships are sloppy affairs, a collision of sexual chemistry, lifestyle compatibility and no small amount of luck.
In reality, it’s the constant fairly small; the average man has around 6 sexual partners in his lifetime and usually loses his virginity between the ages of 17 to 24.
In fact, the younger you are, the odds higher are that you’re actually going to have fewer partners than previous generations.
To them, dating is less of an organic experience and more of a collection of statistics, perfect builds and arbitrary rules that bear absolutely no relationship to reality.
Much like that annoying guy who’d rage quit from your DOTA session if you didn’t do things Just So, they treat dating as a series of steps that To these would-be dating Min-Maxers, you have a limited time within which to get your various firsts – your first date, your first kiss, your first sexual experience, etc.
This is just as true with a lack of dating experience as it is with other areas in life. Many people who have no dating or sexual experience worry about being a bad kisser or a bad lay or not knowing how affectionate to be in public or any of a myriad insecurities and anxieties.
Having little (or no) experience has nothing to do with who you are as a person; it’s a contextless data point in your life. But No matter how many partners we’ve had or haven’t had, we all come to a new relationship not knowing the other person’s likes and dislikes.
We tend to make assumptions based around expectations built up by pop-culture and expectations about what makes a “real” man, assuming that everybody (but us) has been riding the sex train since the 5th Grade while we’re still Machokeing our Combusken at 19.
(That remaining 1 out of 10 has done you the favor of self-selecting out of your dating pool and you should be grateful that you don’t need to deal with them.) When you’re treating your lack of dates or sexual activity as a crime perpetuated against you by the universe, it makes you considerably less attractive to… If you dig into women’s about how they behave and the attitudes they had towards themselves, towards women and towards relationships. There’s two ways that making excuses doesn’t help you.
First and foremost is trying to rationalize away your inexperience.
But here’s the fun thing about numbers: they don’t tell you as much as we think.
Someone who’s had many sex partners may be the last of the red hot lovers… Someone who’s had very few may well be shy and awkward…