End a dating relationship

So, just be tactful with them--please don't say things like, "We weren't even really dating," or "I don't know why you're so upset." Being broken up with sucks, no matter the circumstances. Image source:i Stock It's tempting to break up with someone in a way that gives them a modicum of hope, like by saying that you're too caught up in school or you're not really over your ex yet.Unless you really feel like this is what's holding you back, don't do this--it'll just make them think that you'll be coming back to them when those things have been resolved.If you’re searching for personal insight from someone with whom you spent a couple of evenings out of the 30,000 you’ve got on this Earth, I’m afraid you’ve got the wrong number.It’s an old platitude, but it’s true: Breaking up is hard to do. Breaking up with someone you aren’t even really dating, technically. Particularly if you want to end things–after all, breaking up is, by most people’s definition, the act of ending a relationship. Stay away from anyplace where groups of art school students arrive in herds and Instagram their mango-cilantro margaritas — they will take notes on their phones and incorporate the dialogue into their webseries. Right before I break up with someone in a bar, I think about all those movies and TV shows where a bartender protagonist has to step away to tend to an angry girlfriend/boyfriend or some other plot point as Tegan and Sara plays in the background, and I am stricken with fear that it will take forever to get drinks and the check. If you're like "First let's hold hands and spoon-feed each other couscous for an hour, then after dinner I'll end it," you are either Leopold or Loeb and seeya in hell. Because any bar will do, unless it's so crowded that you have to shout.It's immature, lazy, and just very not-cool overall.

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Or it is intensely personal, in which case: Do you really want him to spell it out for you?Better to stage a quick dissolve: If you go out with someone a few times and are just not feeling it, the clear, elegant solution is to just never text them. When it comes to modern digital relationships, the rhythm of the exchange tells us as much as its literal content, and it doesn’t take any specialized skill to read between the lines. But when it comes to auditioning potential romantic partners, we’re all acting out of our own self-interest.If you’re initiating all the texts in the relationship, the recipient just isn’t that into you; if you’re not getting any texts back, the recipient isn’t into you at all. Our exploratory dalliance only persists as long as our interests align.In today’s weird, disjointed, dating/hookup/whatever culture, it’s increasingly common to find yourself in some kind of nebulous non-relationship, whether it’s a friends with benefits situation or a “just hooking up and we don’t want to talk about what’s really happening” kind of deal. How can you break up with someone if you aren’t even officially dating them?Find out how to do so in the gallery below: As a past ghoster and ghost-ee, please, please, please don't ghost--the act of basically just disappearing from someone's life by ignoring them instead of actually breaking up with them--anyone.

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