I do believe it’s the anxiety of not knowing “how long” that creates most of the singleness-misery, not the actual wait itself. Jobs, schools, places, friends, partners – all change. So if all those things happened then, why wouldn’t they happen in the next 10 years of your life? Try looking for single people instead – in real life, in media, anywhere you can spot them. Do that for at least few weeks, or until you have enough evidence that the world is not comprised only of couples. Yes, people in couples are not necessarily happier than you either. for another post.) Step two – change your life: put the rest of your life under control, as much as you can. And you’re not putting your life on hold while he or she arrives.
If you knew the exact date in the future when you’ll meet your match, you’d probably feel pretty OK about your life right now. But since neither of us knows that, let’s see what else we can do… Step one – change your thoughts: do a reality check. That will make you feel less hopeless and helpless. The more you feel you are in control of your life – the happier you feel, the better you look, the more you smile, the more fun you have. As you do that, you’ll start attracting a much more interesting bunch of people in your life. People get drawn to your energy, liveliness, your confidence, your spark.
They say they would rather be in jail than be on medication for their mental illness. Sometimes you have to say goodbye to a person with a mental illness. This mental illness reality is unbearably painful as it will shortly result in his having nowhere to live. I’m not mean, uncaring, inflexible, unhelpful or cruel.
They can’t take care of themselves and they are going to end up on the street. Sometimes you have to cut a person with mental illness out of your life. I’m telling people to save themselves from the gosh darn Titanic.
You go back and forth, you make pros and cons lists—you know the deal.
After the deed is done, it's sometimes hard to tell whether the breakup was a mistake or not.
What grounds you have to believe you will stay single? If you get what you want in other areas of life, you will feel more confident you can do it in your love life as well. If you are unhappy in your job – look for one that will make you feel better. When you feel you are in the right place, and you believe love can happen for you: the right partner will come, without a doubt.
There are at least a couple of bipolars and likely a schizophrenic or two hiding in the wings. People who won’t get treatment and continue to hurt you are the Titanic. There have been enough illegal drugs to fuel a Columbian cartel and enough alcohol to float an ark. There have been suicide attempts, hospitalizations and crazy, abusive behavior galore. And I don’t have a relationship with any of these mentally ill people. Not one of them gets help, follows a regimen, admits to the mental illness, or tries to get better. And my brother, the one I grew up with, the one who I remember with white-blond hair, the one that would sleep under the covers and wake with rosy cheeks, the one that had Winnie-the-Pooh fuzzy pajamas with booties, is mentally ill. You have so many conflicting feelings that it's impossible to decipher the emotional part of your brain from the logical part.You wonder if wanting to get back together with your ex will fade or if the feeling means you were never meant to break up in the first place.